Managing my BiPolar....6 months later.

Today was my monthly session with Lillian. Now that we only meet once a month there is a lot to review. Add to that the changes of the last 6 months and we never are short on discussion material.
There are a lot of factors that have come into play abut we will start with my weight.

When, asked Lillian did you make the switch emotionally, to knowing you had it under control?
Hmmm, I guess about 6-8 weeks ago.

Its interesting as I would not have said that but the minute she asked I had an answer. She could see and hear it. My discussions about  my program have a whole different tone. Gone is the agonizing and all talk is of how, not if.

Its true, I do know I have it.
No, its not coming as quickly as I would like but some of that is me and some of it, is just how it is. The difference is that I accept that. It does not derail me.

I continue to do my workouts and eat clean/fuel my body. I miss some days and eat things I should not on others.
But they are not tied together and I can accept them as they are.
I am comfortable with where I am. That does not mean I have any intention of stopping it simply means the internal war is finally over......sigh.
As much as I have done many programs and done them well this time I bought into it.
What I mean by that, is I am not on a weight loss program any longer.

This is the life plan and I get and embrace that.
There is not a  time that I will be eating for more than fuel and not giving my body what it needs in a workout session.
I own an aging body and I plan to give it every means available to over come that.
What I do affects, what I do and will be able to do.

So this is my lifestyle and I am very happy with it. Not a big struggle at all, in fact its a relief.

The other factor is the use of my SAD lamp and my go wear band.
It is really interesting to see my sleep patterns change and evolve under the use of my lamp.
My quality of sleep has gone from 85% to 96%. A huge difference and one of the  biggest management issues with Bipolar.
Folks with BP do not sleep and that is one of the biggest drugs they give you and why.
So getting my sleep pattern to 96% efficiency is beyond imagining.
We discussed today that in the future I will likely not quit using the SAD over summer months.
It may be fine for people dealing with a different root of depression but maybe not for BP.

March 23 the A8 began their quest.
Its been very successful. I hope that all take a good look at what you have accomplished in the last 6 months.
We have made amazing strides and continue to.
Most importantly we are still a group. Some things have changed but they are supposed to.
Everyone is still here and moving forward. It may not feel like it someday but like Lillian I see it through eyes that know the pain of the past.
Its all good my friends. What an awesome 6 months we have had, so glad we are on this journey together.