2010

Today began slowly. The one thing I have finally learned is to relax and take advantage of down time.
There was nothing that needed doing today and anything I had planned was later on.
I really wanted to start my 365/yoga today. I was concerned that allowing my arm to stop me would have repercussions down the road.

I am a long way from trusting myself with this commitment issue. Its long ingrained and I have given myself too much leeway in the past. I am not down on myself over that, just being realistic and working toward overcoming old subconscious behavior.
I spent a bit of time yesterday dealing with some issues I had been avoiding. Like usual my angst over them was unfounded.
I am not sure I can retrain my brain to stop its path to worse case scenario but I can take steps to stop it from needing to travel there.
One of my NY's commitments is to deal with these things immediately.
I wll open all my mail upon arrival and keep track of any f these items weekly.
No more avoidance.
The bizarre thing with it is that seldom are things bad but I make them that way by avoiding them.
Add or create problems.
Ridding anxiety is as important as ridding myself of depression.
So like the need to be active daily and take steps to ensure that I will also take daily steps to deal with the anxiety.
BiPolar produces so many tics in us that we end up adding or exasperating ur own problems.
There can be no inner peace until we eliminate the self created obstacles,
I suspect daily yoga and the slowing down it creates will assist with this.
I discovered many great things about 2009 yesterday. In fact there was more great than not.
Thats a huge statement given what the last 17 years have been.
I am looking forward to 2010. I suspect I shall go places I never dreamed of.
cindi